A shocking revelation of someone’s true age, as contrary to his profile age, has brought me to question if I, and many of you from the era when age discrimination is a crime, have become ageist.

He was a guy I met a few months ago. He has a pair of lips constantly moisturised by lip guard and a body skin definitely softer than mine. I thought his profile age was an overstatement until he revealed that he actually was 5 years older than his virtual projection. Disbelieved. Is this even possible? And most importantly, what is the secret?

Let me briefly explain the term ‘profile age’ before we dwell on the topic. In our current time span when relying on friends to introduce their other single and available friends in the vain hope of finding love has become exponentially challenging, we resorted to the convenience of internet and have become heavily dependant on dating websites. Filling up the age column in a personal profile, genuine or not is evidently another topic, has become inevitable, if not mandatory, on many of these sites.

From personal observation, if someone is out of the socially regarded premier age group, or the 20s, a standard discount – five years younger – is what he will do to ensure a wider popularity and higher scoring chances. And for the record, I have met with people who skewed to the extreme of 10 years. No question, honesty is undoubtedly out of the menu. And yes, everyone wants to date a younger one: 30s prefer 20s, 40s prefer 30s (and 20s), 50s prefer 40s (and 30s and 20s), etc.

Nevertheless, my personal experience has convinced me that the disguises of these cyber liars are utterly undetectable. Well, that of course if we eliminate the idea that my stupidity in guessing one’s age is unbeatable. However, based on the recent revelation and my subsequent reaction, I couldn’t help but wonder, if I have known his real age, will I even consider meeting him in the very first place? And if I didn’t, does it make me an ageist?

I paused, recollected my memory, and then questioned myself: How many people have I turned down based purely on age? Many. And speaking from personal experience, filtering down the list of personal profiles and (subconsciously) associate a person’s age to a certain pairs of words has never become a strenuous task: young, energetic and unwilling to settle down for the 20s; mature, sexy and experienced for the 30s; experienced, romantic and seriously-looking for the early 40s; partially giving up, slightly desperate, and horny for the late 40s; perverse, desperate and rude for the 50s onwards.

Have you seen the downwards trend of the description? No wonder most people lied. Even though my aforementioned description may have been hinting a slight opportunity that I am perhaps an ageist, there is, as always in the rule of universe, exception – when someone looks good. And the guy we have been talking about on here, is definitely one of these exceptions.

When in discussions, while some (older) friends confessed they could hardly imagine themselves dating people older than 40, I questioned on why even though not preferred, I had always ended up with the 40s. Was it because I fell into their cyber lies? Maybe. Was it because I admired their maturity, gentleness and sex appeal? Probably. Or was it simply because I was horny and desperate? Idea rejected – in my defence, I have dated many youngsters too.

While my experience has taught me that as long as the preservation and maintenance are good, age normally doesn’t come in as an issue. However, the more serious underlying concern is, will we even share a mutual conversation topic, which is uber important in a long(er) term relationship? It will be funny to imagine myself talking about Lady Gaga while the other one is telling me about Sunset Boulevard, no?

Nevertheless, I have learnt from experience that despite the obvious fact that two people are from different generations, a relationship could work. The key to success is common interests that are of course independent of age factor. For examples, interests in photography, cooking, travelling, sports. When two people share an activity, for instance, going on a photography tour, they bond stronger together. Failing this, I reckon only magic could make things work.

What’s the conclusion? It’s clear that I am defending that we, well at least me, are not ageist. Or at least I would argue and advocate that we follow our hearts in most occasions. And I believe if you truly like someone, age will never become a topic of concern. (But err, maybe not too much?) Of course, good look never hurt! But then again, who can guarantee an eternal youth? And we certainly do not want to evolve from being ageist to ‘facist’ , do we?